Crowing on the Pearly Gates

No, no. Don't worry, Old One-Eyed Calico Jack is just fine. Better than fine. In fact he's so good he surely thinks he's died and gone to heaven.


You see, now that the male population has been thinned down to the bare minimum things are certainly looking up for Old Jack. Way up. Not only does he have his own swingin' bachelor pad and his own lady friends brought in especially for his pleasure, now that Little Jack is gone Precious and Sweet Pea have moved in with Old Jack as well. So now he is surrounded by pretty young things while Blackbeard is living with the Old Wenches and the Fat Bottom Girls. (I swear I heard a laugh coming from Jack's side of the coop the other day that reminded me of Rosco P. Coltrane.)

Yep, Old One-Eyed Calico Jack is holding his head high and crowing on the pearly gates. I fully expect to catch him wearing a smoking jacket any day now. And ten bucks says once the weather warms up he's gonna want a hot tub.