I Have a Confession to Make

Sometimes we play a little game in the barn called, Tell Me Three Things I Didn't Know About You. It is a good way to get to know the people you're working with. I'm often at a disadvantage since every detail of my life for the past six years has been spelled out on a blog for public display. I have to dig deep to find something nobody knows about. Generally that means something from a past that now seems a lifetime ago. In the spirit of that little game we play, in order to tell today's story, I have to make a confession.

I am a geek. 

As in card carrying member of Bill Gates certified geek squad, complete with a former subscription to PC World. I could take a computer apart and put it back together, I walked around with one of those little loose screw grabber things to prove it. I knew BASIC. I blame that on my parents for buying that first TRS-80 and later the Commodore 64. I built networks. PC networks. I certainly wouldn't have been seen fiddling around with one of those MAC computers. Heavens no.

Problem was, I was a girl. A farm girl no less. A career in technology at the time pretty much required you to play D&D, drink a case of Mountain Dew a day and have body odor control problems. I didn't exactly fit in. Unlike my coworkers I was able to communicate effectively. I would attend meetings where all the men in the room would look at me as if they were thinking, "She's cute, but why is she here?"  Then, eventually, I would say something, their thoughts quickly turning to, "Dear God! She knows stuff. How can that be? I thought she was here in case we ran out of Mountain Dew." 

Eventually I became a technology consultant. I met with C-level executives and gave them my opinion on their corporate networks. I can assure you that I never, ever recommended anything other than a PC. Why would any corporation ever use a MAC anyway? I mean what would Bill think? Would he end our long term relationship by taking away my certification? *gasp* Throughout the years I have maintained my loyalty. Sure, I had a marketing job where I was provided with a MAC. I rarely used it. By then I felt I had a decent desktop publishing program on my PC. I didn't need a MAC.

Then, just recently, my laptop starting having problems. Major problems. Like it would get so hot it would nearly set my pants on fire or if I tried to watch an online video the fan would kick in and sound like the space shuttle taking off. Never mind that I had to archive my photos off every few weeks because the hard drive was miniscule. I've been told by experts I should drop Bill and go with MAC for years. I just couldn't let go. What if MAC wasn't better? Would Bill take me back?

Then, one day, I happened to meet an Apple genius while perusing the mall. All he had to do was show me how processing photos in a MAC works today and I was ready to drop old Bill like a hot potato. "I'll take that one," I said pointing to the solid state retina display model. Unfortunately, as in true Apple style, they released a product but didn't actually have any available to sell. I had to wait a month for it to be built and then show up in the mail. 

It arrived today. I've been using the new laptop for a couple of hours and can't even tell the darned thing is on, it makes no noise and is cold as can be. MAC is better. Much better. 

All I can say is, "I'm sorry, Bill. We've just grown apart. I feel I have changed and you are still the same you have always been. It's me, not you. Don't feel bad. I'm sure you will meet someone new. Goodbye Bill."